Before I start this I want to make this clear I am not perfect and there are plenty of areas I struggle with discipline. However there are areas I excel in so please take my advice with a grain of salt.
What is Discipline?
To sum it up: it’s getting something done when and how you decided to do it. Sounds pretty simple? Well it is simple, but it’s certainly not easy. You don’t usually need discipline for things you like doing. If you do, then you need to look at why. But it’s generally for stuff you don’t like doing and need to get done. It can also be for something you would like to achieve, but don’t like the process to achieve it. It’s a game of will power, planning, technique, and effort.
Discipline is not about being on top of all things, doing everything perfect and on time. It’s not about having the “perfect body” or having the perfect emotional responses to everything. That’s not discipline, that’s an unachievable toxic day dream. You literally can’t do it all right all at once. The human mind can really only focus on a few tasks throughout the day or week. And you will do better if you only pick one task at a time to focus on. Don’t feel bad if you don’t have “discipline”. The truth is you do. You get up, you go to work, you pay bills, you cook, clean, take care of kids and animals, maybe even a few plants. You take care of a car. You do hobbies. And you even showed up for class! All of that took effort and will power and discipline. At some level you said you would do these things and you do! Go you! Now let’s look how discipline works and why we struggle and learn how to apply this to our Jedi training.
Discipline is about naming goals you want to achieve and then making them happen. You can’t do it all. No one has discipline in all things in their life, but some are better about making those goals happen than others. I have discipline over hiking, cooking, work, cleaning, and trip planning. Those are the tasks I want to do and know I can make happen, but there are other tasks that I fail miserable at such as eating healthy and other forms of exercise (which is why I picked sit ups). I try and I last maybe a week to a month before something happens and the plan falls apart. Oh well It takes practice and time. Failure will happen. You have to look at why you failed, make an adjustment, and do better. It’s completely normal to want to give up, but to keep going is what makes discipline, well discipline.
Short vs. Long Term
This week I had you all pick one activity to do. One week is a great start to discipline, but it’s not really long enough to form the habit or correct the mistake. You need about a month of anything to really have it start to sink in. I would call that “short term”. When I went 30 days without sugar I learned about how much I feel like I need it, why I felt that way, and saw the positive results on my body and budget, but decided I still rather have the sugar. It was a short term goal that gave me the benefits I wanted and taught me some valuable lessons.
Long term isn’t forever, but it can go that route if you really like the result. But long term is something you do regularly (once a day/week/twice a month, ect) over a long period of time, say 3-6 months. It’s long enough that it no longer requires a lot of will and effort to do it. Say taking out the trash, cleaning out your emails, ect. It becomes a habit. Not all tasks need that kind of discipline. Perhaps it’s a temporary change at work or because you have a guest staying for 3 months.
What Types
When people think of discipline there are a few areas of life to apply it to. We often think of exercise, diet, cleaning, and money. Those are all areas we all struggle to have discipline, but you can really apply it to anything you wish to learn or improve.
You don’t have to do something physical. Sometimes it’s a way of thinking or responding to something that needs change and requires discipline of the mind. You could be sick of being grumpy at work so you work on pausing in the parking lot, mentally checking on your thoughts and working on having a pleasant thought. It could be you fight with your partner all the time and you want to stop that. After you talk and identity the triggers that causes the fights, say getting irritated because they leave a dish in the sink, you teach yourself not to blow up at them and to kindly remind them to put in the dishwasher.
It could also be a way of thinking about people in general. We have a newer trend of hating “people” the joke of “I want to go out, but I hate people” isn’t as funny as we think. In fact it’s teaching us to hate people. That’s not a healthy way to view the world. Yes there are some unpleasant people and screaming kids are never pleasant, but the world is not evil and hating people you don’t even know only breeds more hate. It feeds the dark side within you. Being a Jedi is about being open minded enough to want to help others and make the world a better place. You have to chance your mindset if you want to do that.
Why do you struggle?
You struggle to have discipline in your life for a few reasons, although it all boils down to an emotional response. You may fear the change of a behavior. You may have a trauma experience as a child being screamed at or punished for not doing a chore. You may fear the chance of failure. You may fear physical pain. You may resent the idea of having to do the same thing over and over. You may feel like this is a societal expectation that you don’t agree with. You may not find value in the activity.
There are many reasons why we fight the activity and you have to bluntly honest with yourself as to that reason. Once you have looked at the emotional response of why you resist the effort and the change that fear will come, then you can start on the task you wish to do. If you still can’t figure out why you hate it, talk to someone: a friend, your partner, your family, co worker, boss, even kids are surprisingly insightful and a little painfully honest. But look for an outside perspective and don’t outright dismiss their view. I recently had a talk with Miles about the direction of Praxeum and what I wanted and didn’t want. He gave me some really great ideas and a few insights that made me wince in shame I muted myself lol. But I don’t regret his advice and definitely need to have another talk. I need to work on my involvement to become a better, stronger leader.
How to Succeed
I have a couple of tricks that help me stay on task and accomplish the goal I want.
Rewards: If I do 20 sit ups I can have the candy I want. Or watch tv. Right now I am writing this so I can go make cookies.
Remembering the goal: When I got up and did morning walks at 6:20am in the morning I was a half awake zombie. I would question why am I doing this? And then I would visualize being in a weird red rocks and feeling great as I explored and had a great time. Ya know what? It worked! I had a great trip and it was worth every step I took at way too early in the morning.
Remembering the past success: I often struggle with cleaning. I don’t live in filthy house, but there are times I really don’t want to clean. I try to remember when I did clean and my reaction to the results: a calmer home, pride in my place, feeling accomplished, knowing I got exercise, and the feeling that I get to have a break from cleaning for a few days.
Setting an Alarm: it’s pretty simple. Set an alarm. Name the alarm. Then do it. Set two if you must. It’s best to do a physical activity at the same time every day. So if you want to make your bed every day, then set a time and stick to it. Also pick a time that actually works for you. If you want to learn French, better wait until the evening, maybe after dinner, but not the last hour before you go to bed so you can give it your full focus.
Keep It Simple: KISS (keep is simple stupid). Pick one activity and don’t do more. Conquer one goal at a time. Say you want to lose weight. Pick an exercise to do daily for a week. If that week went well you can then go to different one or add a second one or make it longer or harder.
Don’t do it alone: It’s easier to do an activity with a friend. It’s not just exercise. It can be to save for money for a trip you two want to take together. It can be cutting out cursing with each other. It can be to eat healthier. Use your friend for support, encouragement, and motivation.
Be accountable: There are numerous free apps out there you can use to log your activity. You can go to social media and post daily you did the task. You all saw me post I got my sit ups done. You can hand write a chart and check off each day you do the activity.
Look at the progress: When you are feeling like you can’t or don’t want to do this, that it’s a waste of time, ect look at progress you have made. If you can’t see any make sure you are being fair. Did you give it at least a week of daily work? Also ask friends if they see any difference. Take a before and after shot and see what difference is there.
Be flexible: This one is tricky because it’s too easy to keep giving yourself excuses and passes, but it can work short term. Ex: I injured my leg in a way that made full sit ups extremely painful, but I found that crunches didn’t hurt. So I did that for two days until the injury healed up and I could go back to sit ups. The trick is going back to the full effort and not giving in to half doing it.
Punishment: I don’t really recommend this as it’s mostly going to feed into the unwillingness to do the activity, but you can try it and see if it helps. Ex: If I don’t do my 20 sit ups I will have to do 30 tomorrow. It might work for some, but it kills the joy and teaches you self hate.
Break It Down: (archivist note- unfortunately, if something was written in here originally, it was lost when the order recorded it)
Make it Fun: This isn’t the army, work, or school. You don’t have to make this a miserable exercise. You should make this as fun as possible. If it’s learning a language, look up a few favorite words. Learn the meaning behind a word. Learn the history. Eat some food from there while studying. If it’s exercise, play a podcast only during the exercise. If it’s changing a way you are thinking, then create a few jokes about the negative way you are thinking. Find a way to enjoy the task. If you truly can’t enjoy it, ask yourself why are you doing it? Is it something you truly need to change?
How do you apply discipline to Jediism
Now that you know what discipline is, what, how and why to apply it, let’s look at using it in your Jedi training. Jedi training is not a quick or simple thing. There are various aspects and various homeworks and skills to acquire. Training usually takes somewhere between 6months to 2, maybe even 3 years. This of course depends on what level of training you want, how hard you work at this, and if you go for a knighting program. But let’s take a few examples of how to train.
The Jedi Code: I hope you all are familiar with the code. But can any of you recite it right now from memory? You will find training goes easier and you gain respect if actually memorize it. I finally memorized it last year because I had to say it at the Jedi Gathering. So I practice it for a few days at different times of the day. I thought about why the order of the lines were there coming up with little mental tricks. I struggled to memorize one of the lines because I struggled to understand and worked on that.
Force Practice: If you haven’t take my course, you should, but I’ll warn you I do strongly suggest you do daily practice with the Force. I can’t require it, but if you don’t, you will fall behind on the classes. But I do realize people have lives and can’t put in 30 minutes of practice, nor do I think that’s needed at a beginner level. So I try to keep it reasonable at 5-10 minutes and you can even break that up into mini sessions. Maybe after your morning coffee when all is quiet and calm. Maybe at lunch to relax during the stress of work. Maybe at work to help you do better at your job.
Meditation: We live in a society plagued with constant movement and entertainment. We are trained we must be doing something at all times to avoid the dreaded boredom. I’m not blaming you at all. I struggle with the idea of “wait, you want me to sit there and do nothing? Dude I have thoughts I really don’t want to face! Do you know how much internal screaming I have going on?” And the funny part is meditation actually helps with all that, but convincing myself to sit there is hard. So baby steps. Try with music. Then try with very quiet music. Then go for full silence for one minute. You don’t have to do the classic “breathe and just focus on breath” meditation. You can focus on a candle. You can try a visualization. You can use a mantra. Keep trying things until you get the result you are looking for.
There are more examples I can give, but these are the ones that came to me. I think you all get the idea of how to set a goal and use tips on how to achieve that goal.
Homework: pick one task that is Jedi related. many of you picked meditation, but it can be anything that helps you be a better Jedi. It needs to be a short, reasonable task that can be done daily. practice this task daily and post in your journal how it goes. Post even if you fail to do it and why you failed. Use the tricks you learned today to help you achieve your goal.